Mystery

   
     There is a saying, "When we make great plans, God laughs." This must be for our amusement, to laugh at ourselves, for  God does not laugh at our efforts. Rather, he cheers us on, trying to direct us. We need to be open to him, to listen hard, to pray hard, to use our intellect and make the best decisions we can.

     My husband, a retired Army officer, uses an Army saying, that the "plan is everything and the plan is nothing." It is important to plan, but one must be keen on adjusting the plan when needed. That would certainly work for my monthly menu planning, which rarely is followed exactly (or even closely). The effort is not wasted. The intention is good. In truth, the Army saying has given me peace. Imperfect efforts are not failures. We are truly works in progress.

     The Abbey Farm was bought with the intent of us living here "until the nursing home." Plans have changed. For health reasons we are moving on. It is a sad decision, prayed over for some years, but clear and logical now. Though we thought this farm was our forever home, it seems that it is not. God is not laughing. We know it was his plan all along, and that gives us peace.

     Perhaps my ancestors, the Greenes, felt similarly. Once the Barons of Runnymede, they owned a lovely castle in Waterford called Kilmanahan. In 1852 the family sold it. I visited the ruins of it in 1984, when backpacking through the UK. There was wonder as well as a sense of sadness walking through the crumbling halls, ancient plaster mouldings littered around me. Last Spring I happened upon a brilliant blog, The Irish Aesthete. The author photographs and investigates the history of different buildings in Ireland. Much to my delight, he wrote about Kilmanahan Castle. I contacted him and shared the photographs from my "pilgrimage." He was very gracious. In the Spring of 2018 he included in an addendum to his original post about Kilmanahan.

     I have always thought that we are stewards of whatever home or property we live on. Since we do not live forever, should we not ideally care for that property as well as we can? I feel the same  about our planet. None of us is perfect, yet good intentions do matter.

     On a final note, I returned to Maine to bring my son back home. It was hard, his being away for the summer, but he is home now, and my heart is joyful.

     Joy is a mystery. It can be present in sadness, in chaos, in tragedy, and in moving on when our heart is still attached. 

God bless you all,
Suzy
The Abbey Farm

Hope

I am in beautiful Maine. The world holds so many variations of beauty. What a gift to travel.

The reason for my travel is not so wonderful, as we are enrolling one of our sons in a wilderness therapy camp. Our town has suffered four suicides in the last year. Our young people, barraged by social media and a world that holds nothing back in terms of the suffering going on daily, have such a hard time believing that this world is a beautiful place. They are losing hope. Even being raised in a bucolic setting with a family who loves him dearly, is not necessarily enough protection from the angry tentacles and angst of the dark side of social media.

I heartily believe that there is good and bad in just about everything. It can be a hard part of parenting to show and teach your child this. Self control begins with loving yet firm boundaries. Self-doubt and second-guessing comes more readily to some parents than others. I'm thankful that it is almost foreign to my husband, because he helps balance me. At times, difficult decisions need to be made.

Our daughter recently gave us a book called "The Artist's Way" by Julia Cameron. I am working through it. It was originally written a couple of decades ago when Julia developed a method of unlocking creative potential. What strikes me is her acknowledgement of the great creative force that ties us all together. Some call it God, some call it a "force," whatever. The way she describes it is non-offensive to anyone, in my mind, and applicable to anyone's belief system.

The truth is, we are created by something or someone that is the author of all creativity. Even if one does not believe in intelligent design, then we are amazingly complex and incredible in our Neo-Darwinism. Creativity is part of the intelligent human brain. I highly recommend Cameron's book.

Perhaps I will write more again, it certainly has been a long time since the last post. In the meantime I will be praying a lot for our son. I want him to see that despite challenges and suffering, the world is truly a beautiful place, and worthy of our hope and unique gifts.